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Scientists: Earth Endangered by New Strain of Fact-Resistant Humans – The New Yorker newyorker.com/humor/borowitz…

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Venezuela: A route out of gangs via a rum distillery @AJEnglish aje.io/55jt

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Time to accept defeat, McCrory! – As counties keep counting, Cooper’s lead keeps growing yahoo.com/news/counties-… via @YahooNews

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You might as well take the bus. – The Ridiculous New Carry On Rule You’ll Be Dealing @united pjmedia.com/lifestyle/2016… #Lifestyle @PJMedia_com

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The good news is, ticket prices just went down ? – @Padres introduce lame and generic new uniforms yahoo.com/sports/news/pa…

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Good for you @TheSharkDaymond, this is inspiring – When ‘Shark Tank’ investor became really rich, he lost everything yahoo.com/news/m/255f49f…

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.@amazon what exactly do you mean by “guaranteed delivery”? What’s the guarantee, if say something doesn’t arrive when you say it will?

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Tomorrow should be interesting – Fight, flight or drink: Surviving Thanksgiving when you hate how your family voted apple.news/AVd0rYOpwTCWXj…

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cc: @gazregan twitter.com/nytfoodfeed/st…

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Can we focus on being able to drink a beer on the beach again instead? -Californians might vote on secession in 2018 yahoo.com/finance/news/c…

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